Job: Chapter 3

Job Laments His Birth:

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Imagine all of the turmoil and heartache that Job has just endured and envision how you would react to it all. Job begins to passionately grieve about the beginning of his life and question why he was ever born if he was only meant to suffer this way? Again, there is no comparable situation I have ever heard of in relation to what Job has endured thus far. He asks for the sun to stop shining on the day of his birth, he calls for Leviathan (a great sea monster) to lay waste to it, he asks that he had never been born, questioning why he wasn't a stillborn child in the womb of his mother.

Job is crying out to God and questioning why He has allowed all of this to transpire, which is perfectly fine. I believe that crying out to God, much like David does throughout the Psalms, is perfectly natural. We don't know the full plans that He has in store, therefore we shouldn't always be at perfect peace with what transpires. Example: I was diagnosed with Stage IV Metastatic Melanoma (Very low % chance of surviving due to the size/location of the tumors and how they have metastasized) and I have had many passionate outbursts with God in terms of the why behind it all. However, it isn't my job to try and endure it on my own, I am supposed to come to Him with it and plead for healing and answers. God is a God of mercy, but that does not mean we will not have heartbreak. God is perfect and just, which means sin will affect us all during our time on earth because we broke the world. He cannot just allow sin to permeate man and disregard it, the price must be paid. Thankfully, Christ came and did what we could not, but the world wasn't healed from sin, man was given the chance to accept Christ's gift and be able to stand before the throne of God blameless because of Christ's sacrifice on the cross.

Job's worst fears came true (and I presume the worst fear of any father) and he is unable to cope with them in silence. He wonders why those who are bitter are given light, the Holy Spirit within them, if they are only to live bitterly in their soul. What is the point? Job is seeking death and wants it to find him but it eludes Job and he feels like he has been boxed into a world of sin. There is no escaping, He is yearning to be home in Heaven with his maker and longs for the safety of being alongside His father. He feels that his way is hidden before him and he doesn't know where to go. He used to be a man who was overjoyed and abounded in love, now his sighing is more prevalent than his praises and he groans when he awakes to another day. He can no longer rest because he feels entrapped within a terrible dream that never ends.

Dear Lord, there are many things that I can request of you at this current time in life. In the end, the thing I seek most is to be a better man at the end of all of this, regardless of the outcome. I have come to the realization that I am doing everything I can to reverse this terrible disease, but I cannot control the outcome. I am bound to a future of uncertainty and I don't know how to handle it at times. There are fears within me that are selfish and earthly, I seek life more than I seek you at times, I know that I am loved by you, but I don't always feel that way. Remind me of who you are and who I am to you. Amen. 

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